April Fools
Britney Spears To Attend Stern
Stern Opportunity
Issue date: 3/27/07 Section: Humor
Britney Spears' publicist, Leslie Sloane, announced yesterday that the pop singer and celebrity icon has accepted an offer of admission to NYU's Stern School of Business, and will become part of the graduating MBA Class of 2009.
"Britney has always been a bright girl, and despite some turbulent recent episodes in her personal life, she continues to plan for the future, and getting her MBA is an important part of that plan."
Ms. Sloane read a statement from the pop singer to a hastily arranged press conference in the lobby of the Renaissance Hotel in West Hollywood:
"I am excited to embark on this ambitious new plan to learn all about banks and consulting and stuff. My mom worked at a bank once in Louisiana. And Game Theory sounds like a lot of fun, so I definitely want to sign up for that class. I look forward to learning new things and making new friends - just like high school!"
"I am not looking for special treatment, I want to be put in with all the other regular kids."
When asked if Britney's continued bouts with drug and alcohol abuse might hinder her ability to keep up with the coursework, Ms. Sloane replied, "Actually we discussed that at great length before we made this decision. Britney has promised to drink in moderation at the weekly Beer Blast parties, and it's also comforting to know that NYU's campus has been 'coke-free' since 2005."
Rumors had begun to spread in recent weeks, when Britney was spotted on several occasions at Stern events and social gatherings. Recently a video surfaced on YouTube showing Spears with fellow socialite Paris Hilton emerging from a limousine to attend a Stern "Bar Blast" party at B-Bar near NYU's campus.
Spears had been previously rejected from Stern's prestigious Langone part-time program, having provided insufficient information on previous real-world business experience in her application for admission.
"Britney has always been a bright girl, and despite some turbulent recent episodes in her personal life, she continues to plan for the future, and getting her MBA is an important part of that plan."
Ms. Sloane read a statement from the pop singer to a hastily arranged press conference in the lobby of the Renaissance Hotel in West Hollywood:
"I am excited to embark on this ambitious new plan to learn all about banks and consulting and stuff. My mom worked at a bank once in Louisiana. And Game Theory sounds like a lot of fun, so I definitely want to sign up for that class. I look forward to learning new things and making new friends - just like high school!"
"I am not looking for special treatment, I want to be put in with all the other regular kids."
When asked if Britney's continued bouts with drug and alcohol abuse might hinder her ability to keep up with the coursework, Ms. Sloane replied, "Actually we discussed that at great length before we made this decision. Britney has promised to drink in moderation at the weekly Beer Blast parties, and it's also comforting to know that NYU's campus has been 'coke-free' since 2005."
Rumors had begun to spread in recent weeks, when Britney was spotted on several occasions at Stern events and social gatherings. Recently a video surfaced on YouTube showing Spears with fellow socialite Paris Hilton emerging from a limousine to attend a Stern "Bar Blast" party at B-Bar near NYU's campus.
Spears had been previously rejected from Stern's prestigious Langone part-time program, having provided insufficient information on previous real-world business experience in her application for admission.
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